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Today, as I was typing my paper for English, I typed in Twihard. Word then proceeded to put a red squiggly line under it. The suggestion said "Wizard." Even Microsoft Office knows what's up. MLIA

Today, I went to go see Toy Story 3. There wasn't a single kid in the audience of the packed theater. MLIA.

Today, I posted a status on Facebook about how i want to grow up to be a lime green crayon. So far, I have 70 comments and its only been an hour. MLIA

Today my mom asked me a question I didn't know the answer to. Instead of making up an answer or simply saying "I don't know", I held up a bottle of lotion. She took this as an acceptable answer. MLIA

Today, I went to walmart with my mom, and she tried to return something she had bought, and it wasn't working. After about 5 minutes of fighting with the lady at customer service, she realized that she had bought it from Target. MLIA

Today, I remembered I pretended to be Thomas the Train Engine when I was 3 years-old. I'd go for long periods of time not peeing and refusing to eat because, "Trains can't go to the bathroom." and "Trains don't eat food." MLIA

Today my friend said she loved coming to my house for meals. When I asked her why she said 'Because I just had a dinosaur sandwich and earlier cereal in a lime green bowl with a flamingo fork. We never do stuff like that at my house.'....Point made. MLIA

Today, I was hanging out with my cousin. We went to slap eachother. It turned into a high-five. MLIA.

Today, I was working on Biology homework and my friend texted me saying, "What's up?" When I told her what I was doing, she replied, "You're working on homework while I'm acting like a dinosaur with a ten-year-old." I was so jealous. MLIA.

One of my cousins is a chef in new York. Today, she called me to discuss the awesome sidewalk chalk dinosaur she drew, and yet failed to mention that she was on Iron Chef America last night. My cousin is average.MLIA

Today I was dipping bits of my chocolate bar into the peanut butter jar and I was surprised that it tasted just like a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup. Then I realized that is just what a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup is, chocolate and peanut butter. MLIA

Today, I noticed that in the Bisquick commercial where they make pancakes, the little boy is sleeping on sheets with big pink flowers. MLIA

Today, I went to howmanyofme.com, and I sadly found out that more than 99.9 percent of people who have my name are female... Thank you Dad, for naming me after you...

Today, I made a gmail account and decided to select a theme for my page. You know which one I picked? The ninja theme. Another win for Google! MLIA

Today, I read an MLIA saying the average person laughs 13 times a day. To clarify, I would like to remind you that everyone on this site is average, and laugh at just about every post, every day, which is more than 13 times. MLIA

Today, I came across some old floppy disks. I am keeping them so I can show my grandchildren what we used in "our day" when we were their age. MLIA

Today, my dad called my brother 'His Homeboy'. MLIA

Last night, I was talking with clever bot. After a heated conversation of about nothing, it was time for me to go to bed. I said I was sleepy. Its response "But you love me, so you're going to stay up right?" My new best friend :)MLIA

Today, after watching 3 hours of FRED videos on youtube, i then decided to read a book. Halfway through, i realized that i started to say the words in my head in a chipmunk voice....I would be amused if not for the fact that i can't stop. MLIA

Today I bet my boyfriend that if this post gets published within a week he would have to go to school dressed like a pirate.

Today, I found out that my neighbor has a genuine ninja sword. I sense an epic battle to come... :] MLIA

Today, I saw a story that said, " Today, at target, young girl came up to me and growled" That girl was me I think. YAY!!!! MLIA

Today, my older sister had a baby. She named him Luke. Not just because she likes the name, but also because she wanted her husband to be able to say "Luke, I am your father". I really hope that kid likes Star Wars when he gets older. MLIA.

Today, I decided that when I get a cat or other pet, I will call it Perry, so I can be all "Hey, where's Perry?". I am so excited. MLIA.

Today in Spanish class, we all made up Spanish names, and our teacher was going around the class seeing if she could remember them. She forgot my friend's name, which is Mario, and each student slowly started humming the Mario theme song until she figured it out. MLIA

Today, I saw a MLIA about speaking spanish to cleverbot to prepare for a test. Cleverbot Explained to me that not only do I not know how to speak Spanish, but I also don't know how to speak english. MLIA

Today, i was hanging out with my best friend. She started singing "another one bites the dust". She then said "Oh yea, i have to go to a funeral tomorrow". She didn't get why i was laughing so hard. MLIA

Today in class we got on the subject of Tiger Woods and how stupid he is. I sit right behind the class nerd whose voice I have never heard until today. He mumbles quietly to himself "Eighteen holes wasn't enough for him." I was the only one who heard. I bet this kid could be quite popular if he just spoke. MLIA.

The other day, I was craving Sour Punch Straws. After searching in vain in all three convenience stores on campus, I had given up on finding them. My boyfriend's roommate found out about my craving, and gave me one of his fifteen packs. He's my new favorite :) MLIA